The One With A Farewell To 2006...

My window is cracked ever so slightly. The sound of raindrops pulsates in its own rhythmic pattern against the soaked wooden ledge. Something about rain brings a calming resolve to a weary soul. It rained all night on Christmas Eve, and now New Year's Eve - granted it wasn't as hard tonight. Still, the rain brought upon a certain peace to my evening. I can't recall the last time I was alone during this ball-dropping day, but I suppose it would've broken precedent if I had spent it with someone (referring to my Thanksgiving and Christmas alone time). Howard was supposed to be back from his Kilimanjaro expedition, however, leave it to the powers of the airline industry to keep him trapped in Atlanta overnight. I was all ready to pick him up in Jacksonville and hit Krystal on the way back. Nope...didn't happen. Instead, I worked on my laptop whilst watching Rocky IV and Rocky V in HD. I think I got used to being alone during the holidays this year, so it was quite befitting that things worked out the way they did. I am in no way trying to garner sorrow from anyone. Just simply stating that someone like me actually revels in this situation. You get a lot done and there's peace - absolute peace. I'm OK with that.

Peace: That may have been the hidden theme to my life this past year. As I reflect, all I can think about was how good and plentiful God was working in my life and churning inside me. It was truly one of the best years in my life in recent past. I keep going back to how this has been such a wonderful season of life for me. There seems to be no escape from this incredulous feeling of being so abundantly blessed by God's magnanimity. Him simply revealing himself to me in such grand ways as my pursuit for truth was laid out in the telltale of being free in Christ. I wish I were bold enough to proclaim that I was deserving of such a good year. But that's a bit silly to think. Maybe I just saw things through a narrower vision - a vision filtered through the foundation of being rooted in His goodness. It'll never be taken away from me; and that makes me happy.

The biggest stepping stone this year was this wonderful Bible Study (The Essential Bible Guide) that Howard and I went through. I can't recall if I mentioned it in any of my previous entries, but it changed me entirely (Thank you, Bruce, for introducing it to us). It's as if it renovated me and gave me this newfound perspective of being steady in my walk with Christ. By no means am I advertising that I'm now a model Christian. I still go through days where quiet times are scarce. I simply have not stayed consistent enough with my prayer times and feeding myself spiritually. I just don't want to guilt myself anymore out of all that I know which is good in Christ. When I don't spend adequate time with Him, I start beating myself down. That pretty much does no good. The months Howard and I spent praying for one another, our families, our fellow brothers and sisters from FCC, the entire nation, and the world were moments where my eyes and heart opened up to a new life it seems. We would dissect words throughout the entire Bible to somehow make sense of it all as our lives were being revealed right before us. It was, at times, hard to admit our weaknesses, but God takes all of those and renews us. So clean and pure were our hearts after each study. We could face the world with a renewed vigor for life. All of this culminated through my times of just being so open and candid to God on The Dock. I would just lay everything out on the line for Him to see and hear. There were no trepidations and no hidden agendas as He would enter in during each moments passing. I felt such incredible peace and joy. A closeness I had never experienced in my life since I became a Christian. What a glorious story to tell people. I am excited.

I suppose this puts the year of 2007 at a discomforting disposition. It's got some pretty shoes to fill. But I'm realistic to a certain degree. I could easily fall into a maladroit state of false expectations, but that wouldn't serve any purpose. My desire is to stay grounded in truth and to live out the absolute freedom that is in Christ. To not dwell in the past but to look forward to the promise of a life fulfilled.

I'd just like to take this small moment of time in your lives to say a heartfelt thanks for being a part of my life in 2006. You guys have been faithful readers of each word that I've typed. "A piece of me one word at a time..." is what's advertised atop of this page. And that will hold true as I tread the unknown in 2007. I even contemplated going to bed earlier this year, but I'm already starting this entry off by posting it in the wee hours of the morning. So I guess there goes that brilliant plan. That'll tell you how much I'm into the the New Year's Resolution thing. I can't help it. There's just something about hush-filled nights and having a candle burning that just elicits honest thoughts from me. I have plenty of candles waiting to be lit. Each one ready to put out a warm glow that will facilitate truth and experiences from my life. So stick around. Life is becoming all the more interesting...

~KH