The One Almost In Brevard...

So this entry is terribly overdue. But there's a method to all this madness. OK, maybe not so much madness; that's a bit melodramatic. Perhaps my languid attempts to write these days are about as futile as a lasso to a mechanical riding bull. It's a good thing though - hear me out. I tend to write more - at least the entries that readers find worthwhile - when there are internal writhings caused by battles of uncertainty, sadness, or a stoical melancholy state. Right now, instead of basking in the goodness of life, I find myself struggling to take this genteel trespass into a dark and gloomy abyss. The cascading beauty of His splendor becomes ever so distant and subdued. All in hopes that the words that I relay into this entry are effusive and somewhat of an amusement to you, the reader. Don't confuse the next few minutes of your time with a journey to The Lord of The Ring's Middle Earth. It won't be nearly as entertaining nor will it be as dark. Instead, you may wind up at the end of all this with a new appreciation for whimsical adventures. Let's find out...

Almost three weeks ago now, Howard and I were on the verge of starting his car to leave the driveway of FFV to go back to Brevard County. Howard's parents reside in a beach-eroded city called, Satellite Beach (SB). I, on the other hand, no longer have a home in Brevard. My family used to live in Indian Harbour Beach (about 5 minutes south of SB) - where Slurpees freeze brains abundantly and regularly (I'm jealous). We were on our way down to see our friend, Anthony, and his newborn. Also on the itinerary was time with the Bonhamers and LP. Oh, and of course, my rendezvous with 7-Eleven Slurpees and Nachos. So we had packed the previous night, scheduled time off from work, and had the catsitter all set. There's some other stuff we had to take care of before leaving, but they weren't as important as say...a car?

Another part of the trip was to introduce the Bonhamer family to Howard's new/used Bimmer that he purchased back in March. This was its first long trip down to Brevard. So we had everything situated and Howard goes to start the car; the dreaded "Service Engine" light illuminated ever so boldly and mysteriously. It was scorching hot outside with Tallahassee's infamous humidity. We both were pretty clueless at this point on what to do. We could've driven the Subie down to Brevard, but that would've negated the aforementioned reason for driving the Bimmer. Both of us proceeded to sit in the car dumbfounded for the next few minutes trying to figure out what to do. Let me tell you how much fun that was sitting there aloof knowing that we still had a five-hour trip ahead of us - with a stop at Krystal for dinner. We eventually winded up at Advance Auto Parts to see if they could pull the code. Of course, they couldn't find the reason due to the machine not being able to connect with the car. It was probably close to 6:30 by the time we decided that we weren't driving the Bimmer down to Brevard.

Howard, being the authoritative German that he is (he gets it from his even-more German father), decides that it was best to not test German engineering this time around...as the possibility of breaking down in some desolate areas of I-10 might have given us images of "Deliverance" in North Florida. So it's now 7:00 and both of us were pretty beat (the oppressive heat accelerates this lethargy). We ultimately decided to postpone the trip until the end of June. The culprit to Howard's Bimmer issue, as some of you already know, was a faulty laser-cut key and its integrated computer chip. I'm not even going to expound on the fiasco of getting the dealership to diagnose the problem for Howard. Let's just say he's on his second rental car and he needs an entire set of new locks and keys - and he may have his car back this week. Our neighbors must have some theories by now as to why Howard has had four different cars in the garage in the past three months. Crack dealerz!!!

Moving on to the rest of the weekend. So after we decided to stay in town for the long weekend, we were hiny-hungry (which at FFV means stupendously hungry). I think we winded up getting Subway that night and rented The Family Stone. That was a really great movie, BTW. We pretty much relaxed the entire weekend and saw movies everyday with Tony (see two entries prior for what movies we saw). He was home alone all weekend due to his wife going back home to Beaufort, SC - another Deliverance-ish town. Oh...I remember another thing. This was also the weekend where Howard started to reacquaint himself with grilling on his new Charmglow BBQ grill. He didn't want to be an inferior griller on the day everyone was coming over for our Inaugural Summer Picnic. Needless to say, I had yummy chicken for multiple days that following week. The boy is on his way to being the first German griller who's rooming with a friend for over ten years; Christian; and not gay. It's just one more description to add to the ever-growing title that adorns itself to any member residing at FFV.

Lastly, we get to Sunday morning. I remember telling Howard while we were at the auto parts store on Friday that there was a reason why the Bimmer failed us and caused us to stay in town. I mean aside from the reasons listed, I was eager to find out what God had in store for us that holiday weekend. Since our duties at church were covered, I thought it was a perfect opportunity to pay homage to my peeps at the Chinese Christian Church. I had heard so much about it from the Hollands and from my professor at FSU. This is the part of the entry you've all been waiting for. I'll just go on the record to say that our visit was very cool and that God blessed us abundantly that morning. And now, here's Howard's account on what occurred:

Since Hank and I didn't plan on being in town for the weekend, all of our church duties for Sunday's service had been covered by others. Hank suggested that we visit the Chinese Christian Church. We assumed the service began at 11:00. To avoid as much of the uncomfortable feelings that come from being in a new place, and for me speaking a different language, we timed our arrival to be as close to 11:00 as possible.

Upon our arrival we noticed that the service began 15 minutes earlier, at 10:45. We walked in, sat in the back, and immediately the preacher stopped his message and asked if anyone needed a translator. Of course this caused the entire congregation (about 40-50) people to turn and stare at us, the exact situation we were trying to avoid.

Using his mad Chinese skills, Henry indicated that I would need a translator. Most of the church members, including all of their translators, were attending a conference out of town, so someone not used to translating volunteered to sit next to me and translate the sermon. I initially felt bad for this guy who probably came to church not excepting to do this. I then stepped back, and realized that this person was doing part of what we as Christians are called to do: Minister to other believers. He was using his abilities to ensure that I was receiving the message.

Following the service Henry and I used our best techniques to talk to as few people as possible, while avoiding a luncheon that had been planned at someone’s house. To continue our theme of Chinese influence for the weekend, we wound up having lunch at the Eastern Chinese Restaurant.

What a wonderful and pleasant surprise that was eh? That's right, I convinced the Hammer to be a "guest blogger" for all you out die-hard fans of FFV. And this is what we do: We aim to please all of you demanding readers in Blogville. Don't you forget it!!!

Just to add a little anecdote to Howard's well-told story: While we were feeding ourselves at Eastern, Adam Arnold - a regular member of our church - walks in. So, ummm...I guess it looked like we were playing hooky. We're thinking what are the chances?!? We say "hi" to him and he beckons back with an awkward look of, "What are you guys doing here?" I think Howard and I were saying this in our heads at the same time, too. Feeling both aplomb and wistful, I quickly said something to the extent of, "We decided to stay in town and since y'all had things covered, we went to the Chinese Church." Lest we forget, the German, who happens to not look a bit Chinese, is sitting across from me. Adam said things went fairly well with service other than some minor glitches with the song program on the computer. It was a succinct encounter, overall. That's how I like things when I see familiar people in public - to lessen the chances of awkwardness. I'm just glad we were still in our church clothes when we went to eat. Not that we would've been naked or anything in public. It just would've been a much less convincing story to Adam if we were in our Sunday-vegging-raggedy-Ann clothes.

So in closing, the weekend that was almost in Brevard proved to be yet another burgeoning experience for the boys at FFV. It was no crime-caper, but mettlesome in its own right it was. We travelled to the Mecca of Chinese Christians in Tallahassee whilst diverting the attention of sedulous members. A pleasantly disparate group they were. Moreover, they served as a reminder to us that the God we serve, hailed as Jehovah Jireh, does indeed break through all language barriers in a resounding manner with love, grace, and mercy. We'll see Brevard soon enough. But until then, let the Slurpee and Nacho Cheese machines churn...

~KH

Cause our fortune cookies told us so: