The One About Autumn...

My disposition these days is undeniably replete with glee. The beginnings of leaves battling the plunderous forces of gravity are becoming more and more evident each growing day. Humidity levels are at the cusp of subsiding at each cold front's passing. And with the brisk and crisp air escaping down from Canada, its ubiquitous state will reinvigorate the spirit within - wisping bravely through each majestical canvas of God's woven country.

Five days ago, we were all greeted by the arrival of Autumn. This is by far my favorite time of year. The temperature always seems to be perfect for a drive down Tallahassee's windy and canopy roads. God's palette of colors along the treelines brings upon a visual warmth to the heart and soul. You bundle yourself up in your favorite chair with a cozy quilt; napping away the shortened days while the frosted window between you and the cold and gloomy/dreary air serves as the placid divide. Clamoring kids savoring every moment of daylight with their friends before having to rush in for supper. Walking into the warm home, it's literally impossible to eschew mom's aroma-induced beef stew or favorite Crock Pot concoction. The thing of it is, I have so many of these perfect images of family and soothe-the-soul moments of Autumn that it just makes me all peaceful and happy inside. It's quite the wonderland of emotions. However, I'm afraid my rhetoric on such discourse will be short-lived. Perhaps it meanders into a state of aphasia...and wayside it falls gently onto the fields of aplomb.

This dream, so pure and absolute, of being in the midst of family warmth seems so tremendously far-fetched. I suppose if there's anything that I "sort-of" dread during this time of year is the yearning for family. It almost brings upon these acerbic moods that seem so befitting to the cantankerous old-men type. There's little to be said about how I how often fade into this hubris and fulsome facade, but it might as well be that I post an ad seeking help for the family lovelorn. Aside from this stir of echoes, I lack any amount of trepidation for moving on with life - this season in particular.

My desires are His; and to soak in the pellucid light of His unfailing and provisional love will make me whole again. If this finite world ever succors at finding still moments with God, then a tender retreat will once again embrace the loneliness I feel. I am yours, Lord Jesus...

"But a time is coming, and has come, when you will be scattered, each to his own home. You will leave me all alone. Yet I am not alone, for my Father is with me." John 16:32

~KH